The social media is full of touts. Twelve tips to Twitter success. Fifteen must-do Facebook success tips. Top ten rules of social media engagement. Ten thousand followers in three easy steps. Twitter leadership success strategies. On and on.

I decided it was time I offered some tips too. Let’s see. Um, ah….accordion music. Post lots of accordion music. Everybody loves those toe-tapping rhythms. Um, there’s more. Let’s see here. Uhhhh…oh yeah. Post lots of pictures of your pets, and if you have Newfoundland dogs, there is no limit. Just keep posting them. Mushroom ID photos. Post lots of mushroom ID photos too. Be sure to use the Latin names. Everybody loves Latin.

Got it? Here’s the formula.
1. accordion music
2. pet photos
3. mushroom identification

Follow these tips and soon you will parlay your humble little blog into an internet empire just like me (insert Mister Anchovy picture, surrounded by babes). Yes, soon you too will be living the high life.